Pick Up Lines

Your body’s name must be Visa, because it’s everywhere I want to be.

Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

I may not be Fred Flinstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock.

I may not be the best looking guy here, but I’m the only one talking to you.

Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I’ll be your Burger King, you treat me right, and I’ll do it your way!

Excuse me, do you have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine.

I can’t find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

I’m new in town, could I have directions to your house.

If you were a new hamburger at McDonald’s, you would be McGorgeous.

You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

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Q&A Jokes

Q: Why did the blonde jump off the building?
A: To see if her maxi pad had wings.

Q: What’s the difference between a slut and a whore?
A: The whore gets paid.

Q: What’s the difference between a whore and a drug dealer?
A: The whore can wash her crack and sell it again ^_^

Q: How are a gay guy and a microwave different?
A: Microwaves don’t turn your meat brown!

Q: How do you find a blind man in a nudist beach?
A: It’s not hard.

Q: What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A: How do you breathe through that thing?

Q: What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
A: Anyone can roast beef.

Q: What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea?
A: A salad shooter.

Q: Why do prostitutes hate hockey?
A: Because they get 2 minute penalites for hooking.
———->THX to yummy for this one.

Q: What has two asses and an in?
A: An assassin.
———->THX to yummy for this one too.

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In A Perfect World.

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Fun Prank

1) Go to nawtythings.com/soundwav.html and download the orgasm 6 WAV file, or anther sound of your choosing to your target’s desktop.

2) Click on Start>Settings>Control Panel, then open Sounds and Audio Devices. Select the Sounds tab. Highlight any entry in the Program Events field. Choose the Browse button to locate the WAV file. Click OK. Max out the volume – then run!

3) (Mac users only) You must convert WAV files to AIFF format. THe easiest way to do this is via Sound Converter, a $10 utility available at dekorte.com/projects/shareware/soundconverter. Open the program and select AIFF in the drop-down window. Simply drag and drop any WAV file onto the program interface, and ta-da, it’s converted. Move your new AIFF file to the folder in your target’s hard drive at System>Library>Sounds. Then select the Apple icon in the upper left corner of the screen. Choose System Preferences>Sounds. Finish by clicking the Sound Effects tab and choosing your new alert.

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9-11 Pictograph

  1. Open up word pad
  2. Type in Q33 NY  (all in capitals)
  3. Highlight the Q33 NY
  4. Change the font size to 48
  5. Change the font name to wingdings.
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